Bendy and the Ink Machine: Why I’m Never Finishing Chapter 4

My four-year-old got me started on Bendy and the Ink Machine. He loved watching the Thinknoodles play-through. At first I watched the videos to humor him, but then it really got its hooks into me personally, and I confess to being enchanted with its design, story, characters…

The game mechanics are the worst, though.

Bendy is the first game I’ve played in a number of years. I wouldn’t describe myself as a gamer, but in my salad days, I dabbled in the Diablo and Elder Scrolls franchises. Bendy is quite a different beast from those, and I confess to having a fondness for a consistent source of weaponry, and more accessible save features.

Basically, I like enemies I can confront head-on, with weapons I don’t have to make from scratch and then fall apart after one hit (generally coinciding with me falling apart, in-game and mentally).

Brute Boris, I’m talking about you.

Let me just avail myself of this opportunity to vent.

I only need to get three hits on him. That doesn’t sound too bad. Unfortunately, the lead-up to each hit involves collecting spilled ink, taking it to the machine, turning the crank, collecting the weapon, and finally landing a hit. Times three, that comes to roughly a million steps, by my calculations.

The time it takes me to focus the crosshair on the objects I have to interact with, is time I don’t have to spare.

And then the save function. I don’t have, in general, long spans of time to sit down and play a game, and because of the save checkpoint style, every time I have an opportunity to give it another try, I have to sit through the haunted house ride again… and again… and again. I’m not thrilled.

Now, my stats on Steam tell me that I’m in the eight percent of players that have made it this far. So I cherish that random data point as I try to bolster my spirits enough to try the fight again.

But honestly, I’m a coward, and the fight scares me and stresses me out.

Then I’m not having fun.

I don’t have a reason to play a game if I’m not enjoying it.

But I want to enjoy it.

But I’m not.

This is what I’m arguing with myself about.

I’ve read up on the strategies, sure. They sound easy enough reading about. You just do what you have to do, right? That’s what my toddler told me when I complained to him. But when I get there, personally, I cower.

Okay I’m going to do it.

I’m never going to do it.

I want to do it.

Run away.

Can I look him in the eye if I can’t beat his favorite game?

No, of course not.

I have to.

UPDATE: I did it! Read about my victory here.